Coming out to your straight friend
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« on: December 31, 2015, 09:31:01 pm »

How?
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« Reply #1 on: April 29, 2016, 03:33:33 pm »


You should try to start a conversation..

 Wink

And then you should lead it to your coming out!!

 Cheers

I know it sounds easier when you plan it..

 Roll Eyes


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« Reply #2 on: April 29, 2016, 03:56:56 pm »

I think you should first find out what do they think about gays in general...
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« Reply #3 on: April 29, 2016, 04:51:54 pm »

I think you should first find out what do they think about gays in general...

That could also be your startup discussion..

 Wink


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« Reply #4 on: May 24, 2016, 10:07:07 pm »

I came out to my straight friend as almost as a "by the way comment", after I pranked him that he kissed me while we both we're too drunk.
Didnt even thought about telling him, but a thing lead to another, and I just came out because it was already kind-off in the topic.

If he is a true friend, dont be afraid, not matter which way you'll choose. you can just start at the end, and just say you're ~insert your sexuality here~ straight forward.
If he isnt a true friend, why on earth youre afraid of loosing him?
Just tell him somehow, doesnt matter much how, and see..
let him have some time if he needs to think, and be open-hearted about it. let him ask you, let him understand.
there are lots of prejudice, and myths - just let him realise the truth with time.
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« Reply #5 on: May 28, 2016, 02:14:31 pm »

I confessed my attraction to a work colleague, and he was fine with it. Said that unfortunately for me he's a boring heterosexual guy, so we're to just remain friends Smiley

Trouble is I'm partnered up with him for work shifts so I see him more so than anyone else, and it's painful just seeing him but at the same time I like seeing him XD

He's such a nice guy he's just so huggable hugging
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« Reply #6 on: July 19, 2016, 03:17:43 pm »

How?

is it necessary?
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« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2016, 03:47:08 pm »

is it necessary?

Why do you feel that you need to tell him?
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« Reply #8 on: August 30, 2016, 07:45:46 am »

İf that straight is one of your best friends, of course you should tell him/her, but otherwise you can face a bad consequences
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« Reply #9 on: August 30, 2016, 03:41:44 pm »

I did this way: "probably you already suspect, but I don't like women, I am gay. Do you want another beer?"
It was a help being a little drunk.

 Hug
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« Reply #10 on: August 30, 2016, 06:33:52 pm »

Back in the day when Myspace was a thing my friends would find out through my pics and info I felt it gave them enough time to process it before commenting and it seemed to work out fine and they seemed to notice.
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« Reply #11 on: September 02, 2016, 08:29:07 am »

I did this way: "probably you already suspect, but I don't like women, I am gay. Do you want another beer?"
It was a help being a little drunk.

 Hug

 He He


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« Reply #12 on: September 02, 2016, 08:51:42 am »

This reminds me of a highschool batchm8 (he pretended to be str8 when we were in hs) when we attended highschool reunion 5 years ago.He has 2 str8 close friends during highschool but lost in touch over the years and it will be the 1st time he will see them once again. He requested to meet me in a fastfood outlet b4 proceeding to the reunion venue and our conversation goes like this

Him : Do you think they (his 2 str8 close friend) will notice that I am gay now?

Me : With your hair dyed wonderfully blonde and a contact lens which is bluer than mine, I'm pretty sure that they will.

Him : Do you think they will mind?

Me : Not unless you will suck their dicks in the middle of our venue. Other than that, they will accept you for who you are now

When they met at our reunion, his fear were unfounded, since they welcome him just like in old times  Wink
« Last Edit: September 02, 2016, 08:55:50 am by (Hidden) » Logged
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« Reply #13 on: September 06, 2016, 03:09:54 pm »

Girls OK, but boys generally don't get it!
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« Reply #14 on: January 06, 2017, 04:11:57 pm »

Girls OK, but boys generally don't get it!

It depends though..

 Blinking


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« Reply #15 on: March 01, 2017, 05:06:58 pm »

I came out to my straight friend during an argument. I felt as though he was judging me so I said, "I like dudes,judge that!" lol we've grown closer after it. I felt relieved.
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« Reply #16 on: March 01, 2017, 06:46:43 pm »

I can't really relate to this dilemma because all my friends are straight, I don't have any gay friends. And coming out is no big deal. I just say "Hey, I've got something to tell you: I'm gay". They'll be like "Cool. Where should we eat?".
Maybe it's just my circle of friends but people don't really make a big deal of it where I live. I feel like it's mainstream these days so it's easy to come out. And I have friends from all walks of life; muslims, christians, atheists etc.
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« Reply #17 on: March 02, 2017, 09:52:53 pm »

It depends, there is two options, if you feel something for him or if you don't.

If you feel nothing for him but a friendship, the best thing would be to let him know that you care for him as a friend and don't want to lie or hide anything from him and that you need his support and make sure you let him know that even when you are gay you will respect him, that he will never expect to have a wondering eye when he is changing in front of you, of if he looks good with his need shirt and you noticed it. Try to make it as little uncomfortable as possible for him. You need to understand that if he sees you as his best friend, he would't care who you sleep with and he will always support you, so I think you should tell him, not with drinks, not in a private place, don't make him feel this is about him, do it while walking on the street, at school, at work, maybe in front of someone else that may know about you. Or if you want to do it alone, do it, but make sure it doesn't look like you are trying to seduce him, and allow him to ask questions.

If you have feelings for him, forget about telling him and step back a little bit, otherwise you will lose him as a friend an as a potential lover, boyfriend, etc. However, if you think he might be, you can try to ask him first if he would do something gay or something like that, or if he has tried something in the past or whatever, first you need to check if there is a chance for him to do it, and then if it would be with you, after that you can tell him about how you feel. But if you know that he will never do anything because he is not in the same place as you are, you need to step back and keep a distance, even when it will hurts like hell, because there is no other option but for you to get over him and move on, you don't want to stay there waiting for a miracle to happen. Don't lose your time.

For whatever scenario you will go through I wish you the best of lucks, and as a person that was in love with his straight best friend for 2 years, I'm telling you all this from the bottom of my hart and the heart of my bottom.

Cheer up!!! And whoever loves you will remain by your side, Don't forget about that.
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« Reply #18 on: March 06, 2017, 04:23:20 am »

I was working away from my home in Bangkok as a resident in a Central Asian country. I had a straight friend who I fancied like crazy. 30 years younger than me. I'd be invited to his home and meet his family and friends. He used to come to my place and we'd drink and eat and chat. We had a rule. We called it sanctuary rules. Whatever was said with the walls of my apartment would never go beyond them. He'd talk about work, his wife, his two daughters and how they frustrated him in all manner of ways, I'd go on about work and the bloody awful management. One day he asked me why I hadn't married. I told him that I was not the marrying type, but I knew I was loved. I knew that there was someone who loved me deeply and that I loved them too and that they were home in Bangkok. (by the way, my friend was fascinated about sex in Thailand, and I was regularly asked about the girls and the transvestites and the sex change stuff here).

I really valued my friendship with this really handsome guy, and when he asked me who this lucky person was who loved me and who I loved, I told him it was my gay Thai partner. I got a huge grin, was asked to see his photo, and my friend stood up poured two shots of vodka, saluted me, and then leant over to me and kissed me deeply, and told me he'd always wanted to know what it was like to kiss a man. I no longer live and work in his country, but we are still in touch via skype. He has since visited Thailand the first time alone; he stayed with my Thai partner and me. Went to the local gay sauna, got fucked and even had a gay threesome with a couple of hot guys he'd met at a gay bar. He even had sex with a ladyboy. Turns out he's very metro-sexual. He's been back to Thailand twice with his wife, and he still visited the gay sauna. By far - my best straight friend, and we still share things - sanctuary rules of course.
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« Reply #19 on: March 17, 2017, 08:09:37 pm »

Well, I'm straight and if I'd had best friend who's gay, I'd be hurt if he'd kept that from me. Or she. I don't care if you're gay or straight. Actually more different types of people I know, better. My cousin is gay. He came out to his brothers and parents more than 10 years ago. I only know it around 2 years and I found it from his brother. I don't feel hurt that I didn't find out earlier, but I feel like it's stupid that he kept that from me, specially because my friend thougt she saw him with blond girl and he and his brother just said that that sure wasn't him and start laughing like some 12 year old boys. He could just say he could only be seen with a guy. Nothing changed since I know it. He still acts the same and so do I. My friend's cousin on other hand is still in the closet, but probably most of his family know he's gay. Specially when my friend found gay porn and pictures of dicks in every disk he has. He probably fell in love with my friend's boyfriend and when we were all playing cards he started to get pissed because his cousin and her boyfriend were cheating with cards together and he stopped visiting. He probably just couldn't stand seeing him. He could just say the truth and see her when her boyfriend isn't around instead of stop visiting. so you see, keeping being gay a secret is totally stupid. Not if you can go to jail for being gay, but if that's not the case, just say that it's already past the time for you to say something and just say it. If you feel like you need to hide that from a friend, then you don't have a real friend in him.
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