Adopting last name?
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« on: September 21, 2016, 03:54:29 am »

Always curious to see what other guys think about taking their husband's name after marriage. Would you do it? Is it something not done really at all anymore, for both heterosexual and homosexual marriages? If you would change your last name to your husband's, what is it contingent on?

I've kinda liked the idea of both parties picking a new last name and changing it together. Kind of like starting new\fresh again with your new partner.
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« Reply #1 on: September 25, 2016, 10:04:31 am »

Hmm personally in truth my partner and I have discussed this any we would just keep out own names but for the fact we plan to adopt too so we will have to go with one surname (its not like you can hyphenate our names). 
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« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2016, 12:06:44 pm »

I do not like the idea changing your last name or getting your husbands last name, for both homosexual or heterosexual couples. I would consider changingmy last name only if it was weird or funny or if I felt I didn't like it. And as for kids, why not using both last names of the parents? Wink
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« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2016, 09:34:25 pm »

I hyphenated my last name adding his to the end.  Looking back I should have  made my last name my middle and just taken his last name.    I may seek a name change next summer. 
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« Reply #4 on: October 16, 2016, 05:38:18 am »

I never really say hyphenating as an option, especially because my last name is already 8 letters long. Papers, forms, and signatures would just be exhausting. I have a friend who grew up with a hyphenated name and it never really worked out for them. Most of the time it ended up getting dropped or causing a lot of confusion.
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« Reply #5 on: October 31, 2016, 01:23:40 pm »

definitely varies between couples. i personally wouldn't adopt my partner's last name just because im used to my own name HAHHA
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« Reply #6 on: October 31, 2016, 10:59:10 pm »

You can do that here but I would not.
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« Reply #7 on: December 13, 2016, 10:15:16 pm »

Neither I
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« Reply #8 on: December 26, 2016, 12:20:19 am »

So...can we hyphenate our last names or not?

I honestly feel that this last name thing would degrade into very veiled power games...Which last name goes first (or which one is adopted by the other partner)? Are there maybe hidden meanings? (the first last name in the mix is from the 'dominant' partner?)

This idea is kinda weird to me because, in my country when heterosexual couples marry the female doesn't lose her family name.  Actually, the children have both their parents last names (father's+mother's, in that order) and the wife can choose to be called (in public, not officially) Mrs. Paternal last name + Maternal last name + of Husband's last name

Example: let's say a woman called Agatha Smith Souza marries a man with the last name Brown.

Her official name is still Agatha Smith Souza (remember that in Mexico we keep both our parents paternal last names) but for formal or status reasons people might call her Agatha Smith Souza de (of) Brown.

Actually the of + husband's last name seems the equivalent of this hyphenated name thing. :O
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« Reply #9 on: December 30, 2016, 01:52:01 pm »

my husband doesn't have a last name.. so , impossible Tongue
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« Reply #10 on: December 30, 2016, 04:28:34 pm »

I don't think it's necessary.
First we should stop trying to be mainstream, the use of the word marriage is so antiquated it doesn't fit int he Heterosexual world anymore.

We should be happy that we can form a civil union and have rights with our partners.

Changing a name doesn't change the situation, nor do I think it is important. What's important is that we are becoming "normal" no loner weird but acceptable.
Nothing else really matters
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« Reply #11 on: December 31, 2016, 08:53:57 am »

I think people should be free to adopt the name of their choosing, but to be honest it kinda rubs me the wrong way when a person (straight or gay) takes their spouse's last name.  It feels like they are giving up part of their identity.  I certainly did not choose to do that, particularly as I am the last person in my family with my surname, it would feel disrespectful to my heritage to give it up.
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« Reply #12 on: February 06, 2017, 07:08:44 am »

I wouldn't change my last name.  My partner can do whatever he wants.
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« Reply #13 on: February 08, 2017, 06:52:04 pm »

I would probably add his name next to mine, if it isn't really uggly.  Cheesy
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Great minds discuss ideas,
average minds discuss events,
small minds discuss other people...

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« Reply #14 on: February 13, 2017, 07:00:32 am »

I would be okay with adopting my husbands last time, but only if he wants to do the same.
The whole culture of the woman getting the man's last name after marriage is just kinda absurd to me. It makes it seem like the woman is like somehow lesser than the man.

But if the partners take each other's last names, then to me, it sort of signifies the unification of their families, you know? Same thing with hyphenated names.
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« Reply #15 on: February 13, 2017, 09:11:56 am »

i am against marriage, homosexual, heterosexual, everything.So i would not even adopt any name and i would never marry.
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« Reply #16 on: February 13, 2017, 01:24:34 pm »

I don't see the need to do it, so I probably won't (assuming that I would marry, and I don't see the need to either).
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« Reply #17 on: April 20, 2017, 04:51:15 am »

My husband took my last name when we got married. I told him that I would never change my last name, so he has to make sure he really wanted to change his name (I was okay with keeping separate names). It was a hassle for him to change his name, but he says it was worth it.
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« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2017, 05:24:18 am »

I remember I had a college professor who took his wife's last name. I always looked at him as a spineless loser after that. I guess if you're in a gay couple it doesn't really matter. But a man taking his wife's name seemed really unmanly to me.
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