Is Being Gay a Choice?
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« Reply #20 on: June 26, 2018, 08:42:18 am »

Sexual orientation is never a choice.   

Acting upon it is a choice. 


« Reply #21 on: July 14, 2018, 06:21:53 am »

I do think sexuallity can shift (or perhaps its just you learning more about it or being more open to what you want its still the same effect) but I myself certainly didnt get a choice not to say I would choose otherwise now but my middle school self Definetly wouldve


« Reply #22 on: July 19, 2018, 02:55:44 pm »

being Gay depends on many things. A person's manhood, mentality, people he's influenced with and sometimes the extent of pleasure, the media and so on.


« Reply #23 on: September 24, 2018, 06:31:21 pm »

No, it isn't a choice.


« Reply #24 on: September 29, 2018, 09:19:54 am »

It is not a choice - i didnt wake up one morning and said, " hmm life isnt complicated enough as it is for me. Im going to be gay from now on "

1x Thumb Up


« Reply #25 on: October 04, 2018, 06:17:26 pm »

No not a choice not at all. I was roughly 5 when I realized I was gay and not even on the sexual level of things not that young so nobody is going to tell me that was a choice it was just natural to me.


« Reply #26 on: October 15, 2018, 04:57:41 pm »

Not a choice, lol.


« Reply #27 on: November 06, 2018, 07:26:11 pm »

The ACT of being gay (or straight) is a choice. I can choose to be intimate with a women, but that doesn't truly make me straight. Likewise, a straight guy could choose to have sex with another guy, but it doesn't necessarily mean he's gay.

A lot of people think it's a choice because they are equating "being gay" to having sex and/or seeking romantic relationships with someone else of the same sex. In most cases, actions ARE choices... so people who think one-dimensional and only believe being gay is strictly an act (having sex) will certainly think that it's a choice to be gay. That's where the confusion comes in to play.

However, the mere presence of having same-sex or opposite-sex sexual attraction is NOT a choice. I am strongly attracted to the male physique and get aroused by their bodies, but I didn't choose that. Straight men are attracted to women's bodies (boobs, vaginas, their curves, etc.), and they certainly didn't "choose" that attraction. Neither of those are choices.

So, depending on how you define being gay or straight, it could be choice and it could not be a choice.
An excellent summarization.
Very good. Attraction is not a choice but intimacy is.


« Reply #28 on: November 23, 2018, 07:08:03 am »

Wrapped up in the question "is it a choice?" is always the reply --> Why does the answer matter?

I don't think it is usually a choice, but even it it is, so what? In free countries, people have the right to live their personal lives without intrusion by other people. If two men choose to get married, live their lives and pool their resources for mutual support and benefit, why should it matter if they are driven by rational or emotional 'choice' or innate biological urge? There often seems to be the belief that if it is biologically determined, found in animals, etc. then it is "natural" and therefore "good."  But we humans make all sorts of non-natural choices all the time, making full use of our minds and rights in a free society.

If someone chooses to be gay because they have been fucked over too many times by women, fine, they get just as many rights as I do as a gay-since-birth queer. Asking the question "is it a choice" is playing into the oppressors framing, making us justify our existence and our freedoms, instead of just saying; by birth or by choice, I am who I am and you have no right to tell me not to be this way.


« Reply #29 on: January 24, 2019, 05:27:38 pm »

It's like with hunger, right?

Getting hungry is not a choice but eating something surely is.


« Reply #30 on: February 17, 2019, 09:02:54 pm »

As well as eating when you're not hungry.

The only thing left to define is which one of these you count as "being gay", 'cause otherwise whole question is meaningless.


« Reply #31 on: August 17, 2019, 01:28:31 am »

I remember being attracted to men since a very early age, i was too young to ponder about it and think about repercussions and any alternatives... nobody 'taught' me it as well. So i personally don't agree it was a 'choice', at least in my case, but i'm aware there are people who are actually bi and 'chose' to only have relationships with people of one gender after a certain point in their lives. Still, they didn't chose to like who they like, it just happened, but to 'allow yourself' to live it fully it's a 'choice'.


« Reply #32 on: September 18, 2019, 06:31:00 pm »

ew no. how would that even work? like id like to hear the explanation of how a people through all of recorded history, including in nazi ww2 germany has made a "choice" to be gay. absolutely make no sense so itd be interesting to hear how people think gay people make a conscious decision to b gay,

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