Too much importance is attached to a meaningless ceremony
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Author Topic: Too much importance is attached to a meaningless ceremony  (Read 2305 times)
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« on: April 26, 2017, 11:11:43 pm »

Signing a contract saying you are now one is simplifying something so deep... a relationship is what matters - the customs and ceremonies just complicate things
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« Reply #1 on: April 27, 2017, 01:15:34 am »

Signing a contract saying you are now one is simplifying something so deep... a relationship is what matters - the customs and ceremonies just complicate things

And you're oversimplifying the impact of this ceremony. Aside from providing a milestone which is witnessed by the friends and family of the couple- it provides them with a supportive community that ideally comes together to help the couple in  times of distress.

Most importantly, there are many legal benefits that the couple can only enjoy once the marriage has been completed and recognized. Legal rights such as joint ownership of property, tax benefits, adopting children, and the right to hospital visits and medical decisions as family.
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Tell someone you love them today, because life is short.
But shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing.
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« Reply #2 on: November 23, 2017, 05:39:26 am »

Agreed, but it is still beautiful to get there with someone, you are crazy enough to take that step... together.
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« Reply #3 on: December 25, 2017, 01:16:54 am »

If you are going to make such a statement, I wish you'd provide examples or evidence to back it up. But yes, I do feel the same way towards marriages. It's a rather arbitrary ritual and I absolutely hate how people equate marriage to stability in society (spoiler: they're not correlated).

Not a lot of people thought about an era where divorces were rare. Back then, the only way to get out of an unhappy marriage was through a "noose", so suicide rates for married women were pretty high compared to today. Fortunately, we have divorces as a much better alternative and provide greater legal leverage for these unhappy wives. And you know, with a rough 50% divorce rate here in the US, I think that's implying that marriage isn't all it's cracked out to be.

From my point of view, if you've been with someone for over 7 years - you might as well be married. Skip the pricey wedding, get the certificate, invest the saved money on something and use the marriage benefits to your advantage.
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« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2017, 07:05:44 pm »

You are probably not married or even in a relationship. The importance and meaningfulness of any ceremony is going to vary greatly, depending on the persons who are involved. Having a ceremony is a choice that all of us have, if we find that special person to share our lives with. For you to make a blanket statement that ceremonies are meaningless is ignorant, insensitive and arrogant.
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« Reply #5 on: December 31, 2017, 06:00:46 am »

agree the society puts too much emphasis on a ceremony when a lot of people just end up in divorce.. not good
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« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2018, 05:39:56 am »

SOME people put a lot of meaning into the ceremonies.
But many more don't. Most marriages in the United States are done quick and easy with just a signature and a witness. Bam boom and your married.
The wedding stuff is for friends and family who want to attend.
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« Reply #7 on: January 17, 2018, 06:40:15 pm »


The wedding stuff is for friends and family who want to attend.

I must have a very jaded and disagreeable group of straight friends, because when they are invited to a wedding -- especially by a distant relative or semi-casual acquaintance -- they are not very enthusiastic.  Sometimes, if the event is to be held in a different state (or country!), they look at it as a form of "gift extortion."  I can't say I blame them.   Blinking
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« Reply #8 on: January 19, 2018, 04:00:17 am »


The wedding stuff is for friends and family who want to attend.

I must have a very jaded and disagreeable group of straight friends, because when they are invited to a wedding -- especially by a distant relative or semi-casual acquaintance -- they are not very enthusiastic.  Sometimes, if the event is to be held in a different state (or country!), they look at it as a form of "gift extortion."  I can't say I blame them.   Blinking

Not at all.  If I attended every wedding that I was invited too, I would go broke. The only weddings I attend are the ones that are convenient for me. As for gifts? I only send a gift if I have plenty of contact with the person. Even if its family, if I haven't spoken to them in a year or more, then I just toss the invite in the trash.
Might send well wishes or congratulations card but that's it.
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