What's going on Hornet?

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Well, I'm from Turkey, Izmir. I don't know how does it work in US and other countries but as I know, in my country lots of gays are snob and big head. If you are avarage guy (like me!) and you are not handsome or muscular it's nearly impossible to get a reply someone who is above the avarage. Secondly, most talks go nowhere. You should make sex immediately or the talk will end up soon. I don't know. I was never kind of a person who dates only one night. Yes, I did but i liked my partner but they never called again. What is this? Is this a normal procedure in gay life? Yes, I'm not young, I'm 37 years old but still can't understand what is going on. After all these, I loose my energy to meet or date a new one. Where do I do wrong?

So can I get your honest comments? Thanks.

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You never dated much when you were younger, did you?
Its not just a gay thing, it's an everybody thing. Most straight guys just want to fuck and move on to the next target. Not interested in relationships. Same goes for gay guys.
 Many girls are the same way. They just want sex and that's it. Turkey may be different in that respect.

Most of the guys I hear your words from are kind of sensitive and haven't had very much dateing experiance. Which is why you feel the way you do but on the plus side, if you ever have a real partner in your life. Him and you will be together a long time. That same analogy works in straights too. People who have had tons of sex partners are the worst life partners. Something was nulled and lost with all the sex. They lose the ability to make a significant bond with another human being.  Now I am not saying you can't it's just hard.

As for looks?
I tell this to all my young friends. You are a book. Your appearance is the cover. Make it the nicest cover you can. If that means watching your diet, working out, learning something new or whatever. Make you as good as you can.
Focus on you and not others. Make yourself proud of yourself and others will be happy and proud for you too.

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Can't oldies change themselves?   Joke aside I don't agree with heterosexuals and homosexuals are same on this matter. I have more women lover than man and I feel like I attract women more. I don't know why Most gays look for the same. Muscular for muscular. Handsome for handsome. To me this is a stupid narcissistic behaviour.

Also, remember shit books generally have a better covers but I agree to some degree. My look was shit in my 20s and now I believe I look better myself, more selfconfidience. But gays are never change.

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People who have had tons of sex partners are the worst life partners. Something was nulled and lost with all the sex. They lose the ability to make a significant bond with another human being.  Now I am not saying you can't it's just hard.

I would tend to disagree with this statement. From my experience, people who have a plethora of sexual partners can actually be the most intimate in bed, as they have experiences to guide them on what seems to work and what doesn't. As for the inverse correlation between multiple sexual partners and an inability to be a life partner, my experience is quite the opposite. Perhaps this may be your experience in your part of the world, but it is inconsistent with my experiences.

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Try to get recommendations from friends and family to hook you up with someone looking for something more serious. Get into some clubs or join some activities which will allow you to meet more like-minded guys who are into more than just a casual one night stand.

And of course there's always online dating- where you can specify that you're looking for a more serious relationship. Good luck!

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Certainly not just in your country, it's a universal thing. It's difficult to form relationship for gay guys especially if you in the closet, as you can't take friendship further like heterosexuals do,  where you get to know others as friends, and you observe them in their day to day activities and find out more about their personality and what they are like as a person. Online connections seem to be one of the most convenient and popular way for gay guys to connect but unfortunately the only deciding factor here is their appearance, if you don't fit a certain profile you will be automatically ignored. Women tend to go through stages where they want to settle down, and start to focusing on characters like ability to provide for family, stability etc, and settle with someone that offers more than just a pretty shell, with gay guys generally that is not an issue that's as important, so they probably would still rank appearance ahead of other qualities.

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Certainly not just in your country, it's a universal thing. It's difficult to form relationship for gay guys especially if you in the closet, as you can't take friendship further like heterosexuals do,  where you get to know others as friends, and you observe them in their day to day activities and find out more about their personality and what they are like as a person. Online connections seem to be one of the most convenient and popular way for gay guys to connect but unfortunately the only deciding factor here is their appearance, if you don't fit a certain profile you will be automatically ignored. Women tend to go through stages where they want to settle down, and start to focusing on characters like ability to provide for family, stability etc, and settle with someone that offers more than just a pretty shell, with gay guys generally that is not an issue that's as important, so they probably would still rank appearance ahead of other qualities.

 

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Certainly not just in your country, it's a universal thing. It's difficult to form relationship for gay guys especially if you in the closet, as you can't take friendship further like heterosexuals do,  where you get to know others as friends, and you observe them in their day to day activities and find out more about their personality and what they are like as a person. Online connections seem to be one of the most convenient and popular way for gay guys to connect but unfortunately the only deciding factor here is their appearance, if you don't fit a certain profile you will be automatically ignored. Women tend to go through stages where they want to settle down, and start to focusing on characters like ability to provide for family, stability etc, and settle with someone that offers more than just a pretty shell, with gay guys generally that is not an issue that's as important, so they probably would still rank appearance ahead of other qualities.

Very good explanation.