First time posting. I'm 27, semi-out of the closet, never been in a LTR with a guy and slightly sexually inexperienced. The goal is to meet someone special, but until then I find myself having to meet random guys online. Not an ideal situation.
I met this cute guy on Grindr a couple of months back and I've been to his place three times since for some casual sex. He's much more sexually experienced than me and he likes to pressure me to fuck him raw, but I'm against unsafe play, despite the fact that I watch bareback porn almost exclusively (work that one out).
Anyway, I saw him last night again and we tried fucking with a condom (after again declining his raw-dog advances) and I went soft a couple of minutes in. Embarrassing, I know. No idea why though, I've never had an issue maintaining an erection. The moment I ripped off the condom I was pretty much instantly hard again
so then we start messing around with some more foreplay and eventually he's sitting on top of me and grinding on me and tactically positioning himself. And then it slips in, and it felt pretty great. I didn't stop. I think I lasted 30 seconds. Double whammy.
But I don't know how I feel about all this. Despite not really
wanting to fuck him raw, I ended up fucking him raw. Now I'm all freaked out about picking up an infection, and feeling kinda hard done by. I don't intend on contacting him again, in fact it's kinda put me off casual encounters.
On the other hand, I didn't stop. And I struggled to fuck him with a condom on. Is my habit of watching so much bareback porn preventing me from enjoying actual sex with a condom?
I'm not completely sure why I'm writing this, probably just to get it all off my chest as it's worrying me a bit. Would love to hear your thoughts though.